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"The Happy Happyists aren't as harmful - or as happy - as they might first appear to be. Their weapons are paint brushes and their mission is to paint everithing blue."
EarthBound Player's Guide

Insane Cultists are enemies found in EarthBound. They are first encountered by Ness in their Happy Happy Village. As members of the Happy Happyist cult, they wear blue robes and cover their faces with blue stockings; the only clothing they wear that is not blue are their black shoes and tie, and their white gloves and ball at the end of the stocking. Insane Cultists also carry around a paintbrush and bucket full of blue paint, which they use in their paint attack.

Ness has to fight at least three Insane Cultists during the course of EarthBound; after Ness receives the Franklin Badge from the imprisoned Paula, he exits the cabin and Pokey Minch makes him fight two Insane Cultists and a Spiteful Crow. Later, one Insane Cultist has to be talked to and promptly fought to pass through the praying Happy Happyists to reach Carpainter.

In battle, their only means of offense is utilizing a paint-based attack, and the only other move they can use is calling for the help of another Insane Cultist to join the battle. If the Cultist keeps calling for help, Ness can end up being overwhelmed. After the Happy Happyist cult is disbanded due to their leader coming to his senses after being influenced by the Mani Mani statue, they can no longer be fought, and most of them disappear.

Version differences[]

In the Japanese version of EarthBound, Mother 2, the Insane Cultists did not have the ball on the back of their hat, but had the letters "HH" embroided in the base of their hat. Translator Marcus Lindblom changed this in the English release, citing that the "H" on the hood looked too much like a "K", so thus avoiding any risk of similarities with the Ku Klux Klan.[1]

Despite this, the clay model remains unaltered in the Earthbound Player's Guide (with the exception of the "HH", which has a white circle).


  • The phrase "I say, "Arm the torpedoes, full speed ahead !"... or something like that." by one of the cultists in the church is a reference to the famous order by Admiral David Farragut during the Battle of Mobile Bay: "Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!" Surprisingly, the original Japanese phrase is the same rather than some other reference.
  • Another phrase that one cultist says, "You strange unmasked fellow, don't go to heaven!" is not a censored line. In Japan, he says the same exact line; there is no "go to hell" line in any re-release either.
  • Due to the scripted fight outside of the shack, Cultists are programmed so that they are impossible to run from.
  • The Insane Cultists are referred as Happy Happyists in the EarthBound Player's Guide.