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HotelMan

The Bellhop is a minor character in EarthBound. They can be found in most hotels, either serving as the receptionist, the reader of the local newspaper, or simply greeting Ness and friends when they walk in. They primarily read the newspaper after the player gets a full heal (by spending a night at the hotel) just outside the hotel room. They serve a similar role as the Hint Man, as their text changes depending on the events of the game.

The bellhops are notable with their newspaper reading text. Their text changes depending on where the story is, and what hotel the player is staying in. There are nearly 100 pieces of text, with some going unused and/or being very remote.

Newspaper Quotes[]

Onett Times[]

  • "Mysterious meteorite north of Onett still burning brightly"
  • "Complaints about Sharks gang suddenly melt into thin air"
  • "Tamer of the Sharks actually a boy in a red cap!
  • "Many citizens of Onett suffer due to crooked real estate agents"
  • "Girl named Paula listed as missing in neighboring town of Twoson"
  • "Yes... The Onett Times... Uhhh... Well, I made a mistake and brought you a newspaper called OnettStar on accident. Let me read you the headline anyway... 'So called Mr. Leader Guy running for mayor of Onett'. Well, that's OnettStar for you."
  • "Twoson kidnap victim Paula rescued by local Onett hero Ness"
  • "Situation in the town of Threed is dire"
  • There's an advertisement in today's Onett Times that looks interesting. "Even our clerks get lost in the store! The world's largest department store, the Fourside Grand"
  • "Steak found to be major source of nutrition and energy"
  • [...] "Exotic atmosphere! Historical sites! Come to the glorious jewel named Scaraba! Scaraba Tourist Association"
  • "Onett Police Chief still not through playing EarthBound!"
  • [...] "Even a seasoned world traveler enjoys staying here. Hotel Onett in lovely downtown Onett." ...Hey, this is our ad!

Twoson Tribune[]

  • "Ghosts found to inhabit tunnel to Threed"
  • "The brave local hero named Ness who broke up the Sharks has left Onett. Reports that the mayor stopped the Sharks have been proven to be false"
  • "Ghosts continue to inhabit tunnel to Threed"
  • This morning's Twoson Tribune... Ooops! My mistake... I brought the TwosonStar newspaper instead... Well, let me read this anyway... "Tessie in Lake Tess is cousin of Nessie" ...That's about it.
  • "Everdred, Burglin Park crime boss, missing"
  • "Runaway Five's debut release sells out in minutes"
  • ...There was no morning edition today...
  • "Former Happy Happyism followers claim to have been naive"

Zombie Herald/Threed Journal[]

  • S... sir...? Are you going out? The guest's newspapers that were delivered to the hotel today... are different than normal. The paper is called the Zombie Herald... I'm scared, but let me tell you what's in it... "Destroy the humans! Hold the town for our glory, and for the glory of our master!"
  • "Today's weather: thick, gray clouds all day" (unused, when Jeff is in Threed before he saves Ness and Paula)
  • [...] Oh, you got up early today. [...] "Two human kids escape by somehow opening their cage"
  • [...] You're working hard, even though you're young. [...] "Boogey Tent falls! Young human to blame!"
  • Good morning!! The pride of the Threed publishing community, the Threed Journal is back with a vengeance! "Zombies vanquished! Tunnel now open!"
  • "Tessie exists, eyewitnesses report! But Tessie Watching Society member forgets to put film in his camera!"
  • "Ness and company save Threed confirms chief of Zombie Relief Corps"
  • This morning's Threed Journal headlines read like this... Uhh, I made a mistake and brought the ThreedStar by accident... Well, let me read it to you anyway... "Zombie gives birth to hawk child" Heh heh heh... yeah, right...
  • "Supernatural powers do not exist; Human beings cannot use teleportation states university professor"

Fourside Post[]

  • "Over 70% of Fourside citizens support Monotoli"
  • "Over 90% of Fourside citizens support Monotoli"
  • Good morn... Uhhh... not morning. Here in Moonside, it's always the middle of the night. This is a headline from tonight's Moonside Press... "Mani Mani always Mani Mani at Mani Mani with all the Mani Mani Mani"
  • "Famed Mr. Monotoli leaves Fourside. States he is going on a trip"
  • The Fourside Post says... Yoicks! I made a mistake and brought a newspaper called FoursideStar. Let me read this anyway... "Lucky of the Runaway Five found to have been in state House of Representatives" ...That's got to be a lie...

Daily Summers[]

  • "People reported missing one after another in our sister city Winters"
  • "Yesterday the same as the day before yesterday; Today to be the same as yesterday"

Scaraba Papyrus[]

  • "Kraken, the evil sea monster, now gone forever!" ...Well ...there is some news here about...

EarthBound Player's Guide[]

Featured in the official EarthBound Player's Guide are newspaper headlines as seen in the actual game, but in the style of actual front newspaper pages. These pages feature in-game events, as well as hidden pieces of trivia made to compliment EarthBound's lore. Note how some papers, such as "Winters News", are not actual newpaper services in the final game.

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